SkyMall Tuesday: Diamond Jubilee Queen & Corgi

by  Mike Barish | Aug 14, 2012
Shopping / Watcharin panyawutso/iStock

It's been a busy year for Queen Elizabeth II. She celebrated her Diamond Jubilee, hosted the Olympics, and "jumped out of a plane." You'll forgive her if she hasn't been able to fit you into her schedule for a spot of tea or a plate of bangers and mash. She's a busy woman with places to go and hats to wear. It might be a bit more realistic to just enjoy the company of suitable facsimile of Her Royal Majesty that you can display in your home, office, or automobile dashboard. We're always looking for more international flair here at SkyMall Tuesday headquarters, so why not find a place for a woman with a taste for opulent jewelry and sensible shoes? Thankfully, SkyMall has just the thing to celebrate the monarch who never says no to a pearl necklace. Rather than trying to meet the Queen, bring her to you with the Diamond Jubilee Queen & Corgi.

Unlike those scantily clad hula girls, the Queen covers up, making her suitable to display in any environment. The Queen's corgis stole the show at the Opening Ceremony of the Olympics, so you want to make sure that they're represented in your tchotchkes. Together, they're a dynamic duo of delicate decorations.

Think that Americans shouldn't be celebrating another country's monarch? Believe that the Queen has about as much authority as these figurines? Well, while you play with your Abraham Lincoln bobblehead, we'll be reading the product description:

Created in honor of Elizabeth II's 60 years on the throne, Her Majesty wears a crown, brooch, and pastel dress.

A solar battery in her purse ensures a steady royal wave. Solar power makes Elroy the Corgi nod his head happily.

The crown makes it authentic, the brooch makes you the envy of your friends, and the solar power brings the monarchy into the 21st century. Sadly, there's not enough sun in London to charge the batteries.*

With the 2012 presidential election about to throw the United States into a fit of political ugliness, it's best to turn our gazes back toward our former colonial masters for stability. Keep a stiff upper lip, fix yourself a Pimm's Cup, and make sure that there's plenty of sun wherever you plan to plop down ol' Liz.

* Zing!

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